I seem to have found myself quoting a particular statistic so much in the last few weeks that it is now imprinted in my mind:
Alzheimer’s Society: Fix Dementia Care Homecare report
I include this stat in my dementia training for health and social care professionals, which might seem strange since many social care staff that I train and mentor are working in care home environments, but this one statistical sentence opens up so many extremely interesting discussions about the role of ‘home’ in our lives, the links to independence, choice and control, and the feelings and emotions evoked by ‘home’.
The role of ‘home’ in our lives
Why such an overwhelming number of people would want to remain at home is unsurprising. Our homes are meant to be our place of safety and security, places we personalise, feel comfortable, where we can truly be ourselves and do as we want.
So what about the 15% of people who don’t necessarily want to remain at home – do they not have all of those feelings about their home? They may well do, but those feelings are possibly tempered by concerns about family members providing care and support, or the person is living alone and considering a communal home due to fears about isolation and loneliness.
‘Home’ is a really interesting concept in dementia care. As a person’s dementia develops, the role of the person’s home can change: The person may form an attachment to their home that becomes overwhelming to the point that they won’t venture out, if the person does venture out they may not be able to find their way home again (even if they’ve lived in the same neighbourhood for many years), and sometimes home can become an alien place that the person no longer recognises, even though nothing has changed in numerous years.
Home, in the person’s mind, may become somewhere they lived in their childhood or earlier life, which could lead the person to go out to try and find that home again. “Please take me home,” may also be a frequently used phrase if the person is somewhere they don’t recognise, like a hospital, care home, or their own home that simply doesn’t feel like theirs any longer.
When ‘home’ is the problem
Often we assume that so long as the person remains at home, being part of that 85%, they will cope fairly well with their dementia. Yet the person’s home, for all its perceived familiarity and comfort, can sometimes unwittingly contribute to symptoms like disorientation and frustration.
Environmental changes are rarely high on the priority list when families are caught up in thinking about the person’s immediate care and support needs. Sadly, the knock-on effect of this lack of environmental awareness is family members, friends or neighbours gradually doing more and more for the person (and/or a crisis occurring), which can negatively impact upon those providing unpaid care and is even worse for the person with dementia.
In that utopian world where everyone has good post-diagnostic support – which I would argue is a human right – the person and their support network would be assisted to look at how the home is working for the person, with the end result being the creation of a more enabling environment (using the world-leading research from the University of Stirling as a benchmark), where the person’s independence could be preserved for as long as possible and their need for care and support reduced.
The home might be modified to include:
- Word and picture signage to help the person navigate around their home, and instructions to enable the person to operate household items (or even just to be able to make THEIR guests a cup of tea rather than the guests taking over and doing it themselves).
- Clear door and drawer fronts so that the person can see what is inside a cupboard or drawer.
- Colour contrasts across the home but particularly in the bathroom so everything isn’t white.
- A layout that reflects how the person currently moves around their home, and changes as the person’s needs change – for example, you might remove internal doors to avoid the appearance of barriers or the fear of what is behind a door when it’s shut.
- Lighting that supports understanding of daytime (especially when it’s really dull outside) and nighttime.
- Technology that helps to support the person’s independence – a dementia clock, for example, could help the person know what the day/time is so that they can orientate themselves.
- Accessible and enjoyable outside space – for many people, this aspect of ‘home’ is more important than the building.
When ‘home’ moves
So what happens if there is no option and ‘home’ has to change? Care homes are often seen as prisons, but your own home can equally become a place of confinement, which has led me firmly to the belief that what imprisons people with dementia isn’t necessarily buildings, but the attitudes of those around them.
That really gets to the heart of why I talk about that Alzheimer’s Society statistic so much. I want staff to be challenged to think about what home really means for each person they are supporting, and to think about anything and everything that we can do to make the person’s current circumstances, which may not be of their choosing (my dad certainly wouldn’t have chosen to go into a care home) the very best they can be.
This can happen in a variety of different ways, but broadly speaking it’s about maximising the person’s choice and control all day every day, promoting and nurturing their independence, understanding and really embracing the person’s life story in a myriad of guises, and perhaps most significantly of all, validating the person’s sense of what their home is, why it’s important to them, and getting as close as possible to providing the happy feelings they associate with their concept of home.
The ultimate interpretation of ‘home’
That last point is vital, because for everything that I’ve said about the building and contents that we call ‘home’, it’s the feelings and emotions that come from the people a home is shared with (a childhood with parents and maybe siblings, a young adult life as a newlywed, or the home where a person brought up their children) that make up the ‘sweetness’ in the title of this blog.
In those bygone days the building itself wasn’t necessarily the safety and security, that came from the person’s mum and dad, husband or wife. The comfort came from the cuddles and love that was shared. The fun came from the laughter and mess of a young family. The personalisation came from choosing furnishings and decorating as a young couple, and the freedom to be ourselves came from being completely at ease with those the home was shared with.
Whilst that ‘sweetness’ may be associated with many years ago, we can ensure it is never airbrushed out of the person’s life today. After all, would you want your ‘home’ lost forever?
Until next time…
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2 thoughts on “Home sweet home”
Dear Debbie, So sorry to read about yours and your husband's experiences. Very happy to help further. Could you email me? Details here: http://www.bethbritton.com/contact.htm Would be much easier to email as a lot to share! All the best, Beth
Dear Beth. My husband has gone from having an underlying dementia to having a name FLD Dementia. It started with a nervous breakdown a year ago and is progressing fast effecting his speech. I have no support and would love to chàt to other family members who share a similar experience as us. Do you have any suggestions. I live in South Africa my husband is still young, 56. I am so heart sore watching him slipping away. Love Debbie
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